I has a sad

Things really suck right now. I’ve given myself permission to spend the weekend moping around and being useless. Then on Monday I’m going to pick myself up and get back to work.

So before I’m consummed by doom and gloom, here’s some owls. I am so pleased with my new fabrics, they look so pretty. I have another three waiting for eyes (I need to get some craft glue so I can make them at my home) and yet another three waiting to be stitched (I use my mum’s sewing machine) and stuffed.

One of the few happy things right now.

I have been unemployed for six months 😦

In the past month I’ve had two interviews. Progress, yay! Looks like my months of tweaking my CV and cover letter and removing all mention of that scary word “Ph.D” paid off. Or the month was just a fluke…
I did terrible for the first interview, practiced interviews with my stepdad, and then didn’t do well enough for the second. Man, I really wanted that second one…

I know I’m awesome. But when it comes to interviews I’m just too passive and can’t think on my feet. Right now I can’t see myself ever landing a job because I’m not interview material. The assertives will always beat me. It’s all so disheartening.

I get so nervous and anxious that I can’t even focus on other job applications so I feel guilty. But I can’t practice answering interview questions on my own, it just doesn’t work. I need an actual person to interact with. And I can’t sleep. I can’t even do any art. How can two interviews be so draining?

And I signed up to teach 26 practical classes (which admittedly would have driven me insane) at my old department but my form was lost so I only got four sessions. I’m greatful that the organiser gave me those sessions but more money would have been nice.

And I still haven’t gotten any financial support from shiterlink. I explained why I didn’t have all the forms and was told that that was ok – just hand the forms in when I get them and all will be well. So why did I get a letter informing me my claim was rejected? It was bad enough trying to get all the other forms, since the people of shiterlink keep giving me different information.
So now I’ll have to call them up and appeal. And no doubt each person will give me different information and I’ll end up overly stressed and in tears.

And then there is my uncle. But that calls for a separate post.


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